just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
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