they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
the condom got lost in my hair
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
Randomize
