Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
You ate ashes out of my bong
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
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