my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
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