i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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