if i died would you start the facebook group?
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
