Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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