so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
Randomize
