he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize