Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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