Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
You've changed since you got that strap on
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
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