Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
What did we do last night that was yellow?
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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