I need help removing her.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
