just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Randomize
