Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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