we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home