you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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