are you so shy because you have an std?
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
I'm at about main and main street
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
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