There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
