we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
i out mim tonsoeep
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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