Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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