You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Randomize
