We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
The maid of honor just puked.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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