I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
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