To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
