I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
