before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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