a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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