You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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