That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
