some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
My feet surprised me
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
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