I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
if i get the "i'm engaged" text one more time, i'm going to shoot myself in the face so my cats won't eat it when i die alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
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