that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize