hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
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