I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
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