i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
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