do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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