he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Randomize
