You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Randomize
