oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
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