her vagine was all disorganized.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
