I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
it hurts more in the daytime
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
