Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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