Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I look better un-naked...
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Nobody cheats on THIS.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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