if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize