i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
