Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
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