he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Randomize