I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Just cropdusted the office
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize
