no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
