I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Oh god it's open bar.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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