I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize