I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
